1. |
MILWAUKEE
02:30
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I’m late for the train again
gonna pass the blame again
see the station empty fuck
that feelin I can’t shake again
excuses fall like china down
the steps onto the floor
and with each step I take
I feel my feet grow cold and sore
This place is an empty palace
it is my home
But in my solace l can’t sleep cause
Shouting rings throughout the halls
SHUT IT DOWN KILL IT DEAD
PUT ALL THIS FAKE SHIT TO BED
SING IT LULLABIES UNTIL IT
SLOWLY FADES TO BLACK AND RED
Out of my mind, all of the time in Milwaukee
ALL I WANNA DO IS SLEEP
Changing my mind, tryna rewind in Milwaukee
SECOND CHANCES DONT EXIST
Can’t sleep again, sweating in bed in Milwaukee
DROWNING IN MY OWN STRESS
Fading away, done for today bye Milwaukee
DONT KNOW IF ILL BE COMING BACK
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2. |
~lock w/o key
01:53
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3. |
FACETODAY
04:37
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Can’t keep chasing you
You always know just what to do
but no, not me
I wish I knew
But I will try my best to keep
My head above my feet
don’t fall asleep again
just breathe again
I’ll pull through soon enough
Falling so behind
Struggling to find the time
I’m not dreaming anymore
All I can do is move forward
I forget what I came here to do
Another night with only pixels in my view
Keys click away with no remorse
Feeling shaky but can’t pin down the source
Soon enough the nights fading
The light is suddenly pervading
I tell myself I’ll be ok
But god I just can’t face today
Falling so behind
Struggling to find the time
I’m not dreaming anymore
All I can do is move forward
Don’t recall the last time I felt rested
It’s my own fault, I always get too invested
Constantly questioning the road I pave
and if that road leads to an early grave
if there’s anything I have to say it’s that I don’t
I try so hard to help but always sink the fucking boat
I’ll be dining on both feet tonight I know but
in the end I tried my best I hope that
I can say that I have grown
Can’t keep chasing you
You always know just what to do
but no, not me
I wish I knew
But I will try my best to keep
My head above my feet
don’t fall asleep again
just breathe again
I’ll pull through soon enough
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4. |
underwater|horses
03:44
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5. |
THATRING
04:08
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Cut out of the loop don’t know why it seems to
slip away as I dive in but damn
if I don’t try to keep my head in check some times I
think there was no loop to start with
I just wish they told me
That way I’d never have to hear that
Goddamn telephone ring
Can’t stand the ring
I just wish they told me
Can’t stand the ring
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6. |
||||
In the late hours of the night
I lie awake and ponder
How does one picture what's right
which lead me to wonder
To what extent in the mind
Are morals subjective
And in trying to find
What parts are objective
I found that there are none
which display clear cut rules
of what is to be done
and what is left to fools.
We are all fools to others
Unless we see all as brothers.
To be alone
To some is pain
to be alone
for others is gain
Solitude for few
Loneliness for many
Nothing new
Never had any
Routine, a schedule
how strange it feels.
Daily rotation feels wrong
somethings up
Am I happy?
well yes
but not really
but in fact I am
Wake up
time to go through the motions
of yet another day to mosey through
live, sort of
Time to sleep
but who are you kidding
complete your routine with homework
Then you may sleep.
To be alone
To some is pain
to be alone
for others is gain
Solitude for few
Loneliness for many
Nothing new
Never had any
Time with one
Can be soothing
Time with one
can be brooding
But one must know
You are what you make of you
Your own thoughts must flow
You are only lonely if your bad company is you.
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7. |
HELD BACK
03:19
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the past two weeks have been like hell
constantly contemplating all the times that I have fell
short
nothing new to report
and all the while I sit here still
not doing anything but feel
weird about the way things are
and the way they must be
at least according to this
naive human being
I used to think that I could get a grip
but god I was so full of it
they say that wisdom comes with time
don’t really know if I want this kind
hiding
don’t really feel like
thriving
my mind’s shut down
completely
but you’re going on just
fine
maybe I will in
time
has not gone this slow since
we met
please don’t think that I’ll
forget
right now I can’t help
thinking
that I’ve just held you back
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8. |
descent|pts1-3
05:42
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Doors are closing
Walls are rising
Doors are closing
oh they’re all locked up
Walls are rising
things are getting rough
Faces fading
thought i knew you still
All degrading
faster than I thought
Nails are driving
it’s been sealed shut
useless prying
just can’t seem to stop
Always numbing
senses to the ground
Overcoming
isn’t in the cards
The last bastion of my mental health once a
stronghold of security is crumbling down and as I
look across this barren land I see the remains of better
times that now only haunt my brain
[meanwhile] I continue to stare at the past
moving forward’s not something that ever happens fast
why are the death mechanics of real life so lame
why can’t I just lose a life and restart the game?but
that’s not how it works
in purgatory you’ll stay till you
figure this shit out or you pass away
we act like we don’t have time
to keep up with our own minds
I guess if your ok with dogs
pulling the leash that’s fine
and lately I’m no better
I’m being dragged and battered
the pavement hurts so much
but getting up takes too much effort
I don’t have the drive
to make things better
so I wallow in mental waste
hoping that things will change
[WHAT TRIPE]
suddenly you’ll feel great
ain’t that how it happens?
all your problems are erased just like
magic
[WHAT TRIPE]
You’ll feel fine in no time
Just go outside
see a show, out the door
it’s go time
[WHAT TRIPE]
Control yourself
You’re overreacting
Can’t you see how your acting?
[WHAT TRIPE]
I don’t know you
What’s that bout being stuck you say?
You want out well please step right this way
Just know you asked for this, this is what you wanted
so here’s a shortcut straight to the bottom
Falling like a lead balloon
Communication breaking down
You’re time is gonna come they said
but I didn’t think that time was now
cheap references aside
I can’t control my mind
all this drama’s building up inside
and every time I try to comprehend what’s
going on I flounder
Why does it have to end so poorly?
Why do you have to ignore me?
All this time I thought that this would die slowly
but it’s my own fault for having
expectations
however never as a kid did I
reset before saving
cause it seems counterintuitive
to make it weirder than it is
common sense is hard to find
in situations like this
but the lack thereof has never thrown me
down so hard
wish that I’d known but
hindsight’s 20/20 brah
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9. |
03.18.2012
04:05
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it’s been years since I first played these chords for you
the best smile that I have ever seen
I truly believed you were too good for me
but I said I’d give it a try
never thought that I’d be so content
and with you I hardly had to try
so I truly believed that you’re too good for me
but I stayed as long as you liked
brand new life
not refined
but happy
with you I learned to be a better me
and as we figured out
what life was all about
our love remained
but how minds change
silently walls were built in between us
our lives had diverged at a fork in the road
I truly believed that you’d always keep me
don’t know why I thought I was right
when you left I came back to the bedroom
looked inside and my heart it did sink
in a pile was my life all alone and tossed aside
it’s a sight I won’t lose to time
in the face of all this i grew tired
it was hard to see you thrive and learn to be alone
so I’ve tried to relieve some of the aching misery
it was you, that showed me the light
brand new life
not refined
just like before
without you I'll learn to be a better me
and as we figure out
what life is all about
I’ll watch you from afar
thanking you for who you are
I’m sorry that I never finished this
never quite knew the right words to sing
but I truly believe that you made me into me
and for that I sing you this song
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10. |
MG-SON ((CINEMATIC MIX))
01:58
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You know that feeling that you get when you’re all alone
With your focus buried deep into a tv show or
Film, empathy creeps up and swallows your mind what the
hell you think I thought that I was feeling fine, but you
become so invested that you can’t
help but feel restless you wanna
tell these people what to do but
they just don’t get the message
and will continue to exist
in their silver screen dimension
and then it hits you that this feelin's
frequent
I’m watching movies
[they’re playing all the time]
I’m watching movies
[but of a different kind]
We’re making movies
[they take up all my time]
I’m in a movie
[hope I’m not the star]
these aren’t directors cuts
all you get is raw footage
bits and pieces clipped together
with no clear rootage
yet somehow we find a
way to make it meaningful
and pretend like it’s all
very strategical
hours of film all coming in
from different sources that must be
parsed and spliced ready ASAP for production
it’s your own last tango better make it
casablanca
don’t want a plan 9 on your hands
or god forbid a robot monster
I watching movies
[they’re playing all the time]
I’m watching movies
[but of a different kind]
We’re making movies
[they take up all my time]
I’m in a movie
[hope I’m not the star]
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CYBERBULLY Providence, Rhode Island
confused feelings i really dont like myself noisy laptop music
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